27 July 2015 = INTERNATIONAL ADOPTION DAY Confessions
of an
International Adoptee
It has taken me, international adoptee, American-Finnish-Rromani, 44 years to speak cohesively about my adoption, so slow is human development and great the risk. Still, I may not get it quite right, so thank you ahead of time for tolerating my faux pas to take away a final good message.
I had a dream around the age of five. On a dirt-packed road an elderly couple dressed in long, plain night-shirts-and-hats driving an empty horse-drawn flatbed-cart were plodding along to collect me. I felt an impulse to hop on the cart and go with these people that I identified as my Gypsy* family, which was rapidly followed by feelings of guilt for having the thought of leaving my loving family that adopted me, even for a moment, even in just a dream.
I don’t know if this dream was from God OR if there was an earthly trigger, like a Gypsy talk with family or exposure to obsequious Gypsy media even then in mid1970s. I do remember waking up and hiding under the dining room table the next day. I felt tremendous loss and grief, afraid to look out and see no Gypsy wagon** waiting. Full of guilt and shame, I was terrified to tell Mom and Dad, for even in a dream wanting to leave, in my own little mind, though I loved Mom and Dad with all my heart, that dream, seemed like a humongous betrayal, ultimate rejection.
As I grew into adolescence, early and mid-adulthood, respectfully, I tried to master and control feelings of guilt and shame, grief, loss, identity, intimacy, rejection, adoption issues and emotions that I did not know how to verbalize...but it backfired, nearly killed me, twisting me wrong. Not only that, I virtually murdered dear ones with my sad~angry~violent dance and song. Yes, sticks and stones break bones and words break hearts,
I had a dream around the age of five. On a dirt-packed road an elderly couple dressed in long, plain night-shirts-and-hats driving an empty horse-drawn flatbed-cart were plodding along to collect me. I felt an impulse to hop on the cart and go with these people that I identified as my Gypsy* family, which was rapidly followed by feelings of guilt for having the thought of leaving my loving family that adopted me, even for a moment, even in just a dream.
I don’t know if this dream was from God OR if there was an earthly trigger, like a Gypsy talk with family or exposure to obsequious Gypsy media even then in mid1970s. I do remember waking up and hiding under the dining room table the next day. I felt tremendous loss and grief, afraid to look out and see no Gypsy wagon** waiting. Full of guilt and shame, I was terrified to tell Mom and Dad, for even in a dream wanting to leave, in my own little mind, though I loved Mom and Dad with all my heart, that dream, seemed like a humongous betrayal, ultimate rejection.
As I grew into adolescence, early and mid-adulthood, respectfully, I tried to master and control feelings of guilt and shame, grief, loss, identity, intimacy, rejection, adoption issues and emotions that I did not know how to verbalize...but it backfired, nearly killed me, twisting me wrong. Not only that, I virtually murdered dear ones with my sad~angry~violent dance and song. Yes, sticks and stones break bones and words break hearts,
please don't you believe the children's rhyme that violently programs you blind.
Why am I sharing? While my tale may be uniquely vile, data of others speak parallel volumes: the majority of folk on the planet are adopted in some way, yet deny the fact, acting out the cut off from whence they came, terrorizing loved ones and strangers.
Across the planet so often incorrectly assessed, this adopted human loss-sadness leads to violent-anger, stealing from youth and family wellness, love and dreams.
If you ask this adoptee, a humble chosen one and free thinker, my plea?
Why am I sharing? While my tale may be uniquely vile, data of others speak parallel volumes: the majority of folk on the planet are adopted in some way, yet deny the fact, acting out the cut off from whence they came, terrorizing loved ones and strangers.
Across the planet so often incorrectly assessed, this adopted human loss-sadness leads to violent-anger, stealing from youth and family wellness, love and dreams.
If you ask this adoptee, a humble chosen one and free thinker, my plea?
Secure, safe, sound space.
Thank you, please, adopt peace daily over war-game mentality.
21st century TOLERANCE CHALLENGE
save y/our families:
by 2018, globally change ranks of military to peaceful service because maybe the assumed and perceived need for war worldwide is really a distorted call to care for global youth under 25, especially ones left behind now grow’n old.
21st century TOLERANCE CHALLENGE
save y/our families:
by 2018, globally change ranks of military to peaceful service because maybe the assumed and perceived need for war worldwide is really a distorted call to care for global youth under 25, especially ones left behind now grow’n old.
Are you already listing the reasons that's not humanly possible>
Please, Love, take the T/F Adoption Assumptions Pre/Post Test,
its the last tidbit on this page,
I believe you/we are up for the challenge.
Don't worry.
Be happy!
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*Gypsy =
As a five year old Finn and Gypsy adopted American I did not know that Gypsy was the common word used across the globe for Rromani People,
nor did I or my American family know that Gypsy is a word that actually offends many Rromani like the Nigger word for Blacks,
yes, in USA I was able to grow up with a strange sense of pride,
but that I'll explain later, my Bohemian Butterflies.
First, do you remember, my Family Friends, that Gypsies/Rromani were test run for Hitlers Final Solution, considered so unworthy of life that often records were not even kept?
**wagon = vardo ( in Rromano Ch'ib - Gypsy tongue, Sanskrit roots )
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You know, Love, what a human being sees and hears determines how s/he thinks then feels...
That being said,
still today it feels as if I don't exist,
I rarely hear any form of "Rromani" uttered
and
Eye cannot find Rromani in any school text book,
only Gypsy or gypsy,
even school books teaching -O Baro Porajmos~The Great Rape/Devouring
- what many refer to as the Holocaust-
even those books for students of the world don't remember my Rromani name in this 21st century.
I see/hear the solution is easy, yet so scary how the intolerance lingers, then on top of that
even some of my own family friends do not recognize my birthright, my Rromani...all lingering effects of O Baro Porajmos - the holocaust - and the fact that it used to be illegal to be born Rromani/Gypsy in my home country of Finland perhaps...
How did my Rromani people survive in a place where they were not supposed to exist?
Simply by having good faith, doing good work, and asking on the kindness of other humans.
They steered cleared of people educated to believe Rromani were subhuman,
they knew knowledge is just dumb when it condones violence against any other human.
HELP NOT HARM.
I have heard and seen that my Finnish Rroma/Gypsy family used to travel Finland in the summers, asking permissions to stay in yards and do this and that in exchange maybe,
I am still learning the languages and some things get lost in translation,
remember, NO BODY IS PERFECT,
I try to apologize freely and sincerely, and forgive seventy times seventy.
Anyway, all in good time, the truth keeps rearranging itself...
Now its July 2015
and 6 months remain of the Decade of Rromani/Gypsy Inclusion,
our hearts soar, for very soon now we will be roaming the roads, Village People,
honoring our ancestors and healing body*mind*hearts almost 40 years after my dream to return,
yes, best blessed dreams come true,
ask>
copy/draw/paint/write the pictures/visions>
wait>
receive>
yes, best blessed dreams come true,
ask>
copy/draw/paint/write the pictures/visions>
wait>
receive>
YESYESYES>
American Finnish Rromni/Gypsy me and my man,
my woodworking man, 12th generation American, more kind lobster whaler than Puritan Pilgrim,
we are so close to moving forward on self sustainable sabbatical in 21st century caravan!
YES
Save yourself,
that saves the universe!
(:slow roll now, Love, safe sound, enjoy the show!:)
*********************************************************************************************
My Free Ph.D. in tolerance Adoption for Life Worth Living
ADOPTION ASSUMPTIONS PRE/POST TEST
True or False 1. The verb to adopt means to choose for oneself.
ADOPTION ASSUMPTIONS PRE/POST TEST
True or False 1. The verb to adopt means to choose for oneself.
True or False 2. For human beings, the life stage of adolescence spans a spell of ten years, generally from 14-24 years of age.
True or False 3. The majority of global regions/nations raise up,
rally, for youth under 18.
True or False 4. Interest in the welfare of the adoptee has changed
through time from serving family and/or region/nation needs/wants
to meeting the adoptee’s basic needs/wants in forms of basic security, especially love.
True or False 5. Fine People with good intent at The World Population Conference penned
The World Population Plan of Action in 1974
with a clause asking that
adoption serve families united in love to get their desired number of children.
True or False 6. The United States of America adopts over half the orphans of the world.
True or False 7. China and Russia adopt most of planet earth’s orphans after U.S.A.
True or False 8. Cow became sacred in India in part to milk orphans.
True or False 9. The majority of People around the globe
sitting
in
special education classes,
mental health treatment centers,
substance abuse centers,
prisons,
military barracks,
sex industry
are
virtual
and/or
legal
adoptees,
global
youth
under
25.
True or False 10. A fair spell for peaceful, joyful adolescent apprenticeship is 18-28.
True or False 11. Citizens, especially un-enfranchized youth of every nation engaged in violent "behavior modification" / "revenge" actions
(like police states and war ),
those citizens suffer ADHD/Addict/PTSD/Bipolar/ like symptoms,
stunting growth, leaving youth/family behind scared, tired, worn, alone.
True or False 12. Life is for learning.
True or False 13. Life is for learning to love.
True or False 14. In sound, safe time, space with appropriate resources
those citizens suffer ADHD/Addict/PTSD/Bipolar/ like symptoms,
stunting growth, leaving youth/family behind scared, tired, worn, alone.
True or False 12. Life is for learning.
True or False 13. Life is for learning to love.
True or False 14. In sound, safe time, space with appropriate resources
(like Village People and Liberal Arts)
every human being,
even ones that cannot move, hear, speak, see,
every human being,
even ones that cannot move, hear, speak, see,
still,
each human being possesses capabilities to develop
just the right variety of intelligences as s/he wills, wants, needs.
True or False 15. To adopt means to acquire some new
knowledge,
attitude,
skills,
aspiration,
and/or
behavior.
each human being possesses capabilities to develop
just the right variety of intelligences as s/he wills, wants, needs.
True or False 15. To adopt means to acquire some new
knowledge,
attitude,
skills,
aspiration,
and/or
behavior.
For August Feature now visit Right this Rrom
miracles happen, TESTIFY, aleluyuh, amen amin om,
(: www.RightThisRrom.com :)
miracles happen, TESTIFY, aleluyuh, amen amin om,
(: www.RightThisRrom.com :)